No.Apologies article on chivalry

GENTLEMEN, BE GENTLEMEN

Is chivalry dead? Wait a minute, do we even know what chivalry is?

Maybe to you, it’s a thing of the past - like when metal was in fashion and men rode horses. And maybe it kind of got phased out after the medieval period together with court jesters, and eventually merged with the concept of a gentleman. And now,… even the concept of a gentleman is a little fuzzy.

So let’s clear the haze a bit! Times may have changed, but at the heart of it, ladies still look for a knight in shining armour... [Listen up guys, you could use a lesson or two here.]


NOBLE CHARACTER


In modern-day terms, this basically means integrity. Think of it as a seedling at first. Every time you choose to tell the truth (even though it will cost you), your integrity is watered. Every time you treat a lady with respect, your integrity grows. When it comes down to it, chivalry is all about respect. Respect enough to protect her worth, her dignity. But remember, integrity doesn't just apply to your romantic pursuits. It's a code of conduct that you're committed to in every area of your life - school, family, friends. It's about being responsible, taking the lead, standing up for what you believe in.


ROMANTIC SENSIBILITIES


Back in the old days, when a guy wanted to spend time with a young lady, he'd have to get permission from her father. That meant that he'd better know if that was the lady he was after. Today, guys have it much easier. Don't get me wrong here. Being a gentleman and opening doors or pulling out chairs for girls is good! But remember that when you send a girl flowers and give special gifts for no reason, it means something to her. Don't just do it to win the hot girl in school, even though you don't like her that much.


GENEROSITY


Believe it or not, part of the code of conduct of knights was to practice generosity or largess. Says George Duby, a renowned historian, "The knight owes it to himself to keep nothing in his hands. All that comes to him he gives away." The idea was to be generous in so far as your resources allow, so as to counter greed. Guys, this can be applied today in more than just the financial sense. Make time for others! Get involved in community service! Don't just live for yourself. And fellas, when you ask a girl out, be ready to pay. Hey, if you're like most people, you don't have a thick wad of cash in your pocket. But that's fine. Plan something that doesn't cost you your life savings. This isn't about rich guys getting the girl; it's about being a man.


BRAVE DEEDS


In the olden days, men fought battles for the things they were passionate about - protecting their country, their families, rescuing maidens. Every man wants his life to count for something important. He needs a worthy cause - a mission that that will cause him to go beyond himself, to sacrifice much, and to contribute to the larger community. While you may not have figured out what your transcendent cause is just yet, you can start practising. No matter what you're doing, do it bravely; give it your all! In soccer, music, friends, etc. Make decisions and don't waffle about after making them. Don't spend your energies trying to be just a nice guy - you might come off as boring. When a girl sees a guy who's passionate about something, subconsciously she knows you're likely to be passionate about her.



"It is not the critic who counts, not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles,.. The credit belongs to the man in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly...who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who knew neither victory nor defeat." - Theodore Rooesvelt